Communication
became of the utmost importance. This is especially true when you're tethered
to a breathing machine, with no mobility and no device to call for help when
needed. It became both comical and tragic and could change in an instant to
either of these. Lip reading was the first hurdle and then came the apparatus
that completely altered my state by allowing me to speak!
In the very
beginning, right after surgery when I saw my sister's face for the first time I
was able to speak. I don't know how I sounded, if I muttered, if I spoke… But I
said "I'm going to get the f*ck out of here" and that was that. I
don't recall any speech after that. If I did, it was lip movement because the
ventilator came very shortly after I was intubated. Lip reading was comical and
frustrating endeavor for both myself, those trying to care for me, and family
and friends. I can recall so many names of my nurses but it would do them a
great disservice to try to name them all. Those I have forgotten I can still
see their faces. One of those in particular described herself as clumsy but she
was nothing of the sort when being a nurse. The only clumsiness we shared
collectively because she could not understand the words I mouthed. Mostly we
laughed about it but it was definitely frustrating on both ends. There were
others that seem to be able to interpret entire sentences without a hitch. I
don't know how anyone gets good at it except to say I'm obviously not the only
patient that was ever in a position to have to be lip read.
