Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Page 16 - Looking Forward A Few Steps

          When last I posted I was discussing Shepherd and my journey there. I want to wind this down more quickly and say that it was intense and educational and exceedingly memorable. I received a haircut and a proper hair wash, my neck brace came off and with much struggle my trech-tube was removed only days before I left for good. The entire experience was supposed to prepare us for coming home. During my time there I found that I could move a little bit in my left shoulder and slightly in my left bicep. That in itself didn’t prepare me, or any of us for coming home.

          Coming home from Shepherd was a long journey in a rented van in a wheelchair that was way too big for me, and manual at that. We arrived home somewhere before midnight to our first catastrophe. Without going into detail we had missed our window for certain activities that I do every day and had to deal with the mess. On a good note, my cat was happy to see me albeit confused.

          We finally made it to bed probably somewhere in the wee hours. From then on it was a struggle to try to manage my care with family time in between. My “bowel program” became our nemesis until we could get it switch to a morning hour that was more suitable for everyone. This took weeks. It wasn’t fun but we got through it thanks to my family who obviously love me. To this day I don’t know if the situation were reversed how I would handle it. I know I would handle it, of course I would… But how would I ever know if I’d have the courage. I guess that’s why we are put in the situations we are put in. It’s all about what we can handle and we have the courage for.


  1. It is about what we can handle and we have the courage for. So very well put my dearest friend. And I have learned, through this journey with you, that YOU my dear can handle anything. I am so very proud of you.

  2. I have read your entire blog today, every post. I truly admire your courage - both in your positivity and in choosing to share your story with the world. I was in a bad accident about two weeks ago, nothing compared to what you endured, but still very scary. Reading your story I can't help but wonder if I would have handled paralysis as gracefully as you have seemed to, and I do not think I would have. I hope you continue writing, and thank you for sharing your life with us!